Journal #8:  Reflection on my piece getting workshopped 

Overall I think this experience was really helpful and it was nice to hear the perspective of my classmates on my piece. Multiple people said that they could tell that this is something that I care a lot about and that they could tell that I have done a lot of research for it which meant a lot to me. Some of the main comments that stood out to me the most were… First off Tony said “this is a large amount of money, this isn’t pocket change we are talking about” he was curious and wanted to know what steps were taken and how the university was able to get such a large grant. To go off of that Mr. Miller asked when the grant was given and when did the living shoreline project begin. This was a really good comment and made me realize I need to include more of the (when and how) throughout the piece. Another comment that I got I forget who said it was that it would benefit my piece to have some student perspective throughout the piece especially from the students who are or have been in the Gulf of Maine field studies class which I definitely agree with. (going to try to network and see what I can do). Another useful critique I got from Mr. Miller was to remember my audience specifically when I said soft sedimentary rock. The class was like what is that. So I need to use less scientific words in certain areas so it’s more reader friendly. I got the feedback that my headline could be shorter but I’m not really sure how I should do that a recommendation Mr. Miller gave was to change is giving to gives but beyond that I will have a hard time shortening it. One of the main critiques that I got that was brought forward from several individuals was that they didn’t like the list of why coastal erosion is a problem on the Biddeford campus, they thought that that information could be broken up and explained better instead of just listing it. Another small thing was I forgot to add a By line in the beginning so I will add that In the final.